We talk in whispers

There is an issue that many people experience but very rarely will you find someone opening discussing the topic. To me it feels like a word that is so taboo that it must be whispered but this shouldn’t be the case.

Maybe because the topic is so raw, real, personal, devastating, and for some life long that it takes our breath away when we utter the word; making it a whisper that haunts our very soul.

The word is infertility. No one’s talking about it but a huge percent of people suffer from this.

I thought when I started this blog I would be open and honest about our experiences, while living abroad in the hopes it might help anyone who read it. This is a topic I haven’t wanted to discuss outside of a few friends and family but now I can’t keep quiet anymore. I want you to know if you are suffering with this; YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

I have been blessed with being a mother 4 times now, with only one baby in my arms to hold. It’s debilitating when you think about loosing three children. Three children, who had a heartbeat, who we dreamed about, who we were ready to do anything for; to be told “I’m sorry. I have bad news.”

I am currently going through my third miscarriage. I have surgery on Wednesday morning. Although I don’t know if I am ready to discuss this topic yet, I’m feeling compelled to share. Over the next few weeks I will be sharing our story and struggles with getting pregnant, having our boy, to suffering through three very different miscarriages, two of which have happened in Bangkok.

I ask if you know someone going through this or has had this happen to them share this link, it might be helpful to feel like there is someone out there like them. I also ask for your prayers for our family, as this is a very sad time for us.

Love to you all.



  1. All my love to you! Thank you for connecting to us infertile women out in the world, life can be tough but in all we should know that things happen for a reason and maybe you can be the voice within all of us who wishes to shed light on this topic! All my love and strength to you ❤

  2. So sorry to hear Becky. You are right, it’s not something people talk about, but once you do you realise you’re not alone, and many people surrounding you have shared this too. Lots of hugs and prayers to you and your family xoxo

  3. So sorry to hear that Becky! We will be praying for you. You know as well that I too are like you and have one boy and three babies we never got to see……Naomi

    Date: Sun, 27 Jul 2014 07:33:37 +0000 To: naomicicconi@hotmail.com

  4. Hey Sweetie – I am so sorry. I know there is nothing anyone can really say or do to make you feel better. Just wanted to send you a big hug.

    I am working on a trip to Thailand or Bali (if I can get the group to email me back) I hope to stop in and say hey and hugs in person.

    Love ya. Nik

  5. So very sorry to hear your sad news, Becky. Just this weekend I was teary-eyed when a group of us ladies were talking and someone brought up the subject of miscarriages. I am now an ‘old lady’ but I still remember the devastating blow when I lost my baby at 5 months pregnant. My only consolation is that I have my own personal angel in Heaven. Her name was already chosen…Danielle Marie and she is remembered every morning when I say my prayer for a ‘spiritually adopted’ baby. I thank God for my two children because less than 2 years after my miscarriage I had ovarian cancer! My poor Aunt, on the other hand had several miscarriages and then when she finally gave birth via C-section, her little girl lived for only 20 minutes. Fortunately a nurse on duty had the presence of mind to baptize her and not knowing what name to choose, gave the baby her two names – Mary Josephine. ..like ‘Mary & Joseph!’ Things happen for a reason so keep the faith (I know you will) & God Bless. Pray to St. Gerard.

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  7. Hi Becky,

    I am sad to see you in so much pain. I really don’t have words to convey my feelings, but please know that I am thinking about you.

    I saw this article and thought about starting a group for Moms at the Rainbow Room, but then I remembered how I am taking a rest from 60 years of volunteer work to work on myself and my family.




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